Thursday, October 27, 2011

What are they talking about I wonder? I peek into his room and see him babbling on and on while he sits next to his teddy bear.  These are the sweet moments I hold onto when life is hard.  The simplest things are sometimes the most joyful in my day.
I step on the scale and my heart sinks.  All that running and nothing...I realize that it's time to consider some diet changes but it's going to be difficult to show self control when food is so tasty! Know what I mean? 
The hardest part of this whole thing is the way satan has attacked my simplest belief that i'm good enough.  He tries to convince me of otherwise.  That is hard to deal with on a daily basis.  I want freedom with how I see myself, don't we all? I don't want to accept the lie that I am only beautiful at size __.  

Healthy is what I'm aiming for.
Who knew this would be such a battle though.  Thankful that it's a new day with opportunities to make better choices.


Garrett has never slept through the night completely. Normally we wakes up once or twice after putting him in bed and i'll normally nurse him back to sleep.  The hardest thing is knowing you're not doing yourself any favor but how do you break a bad habit? 
We just started to last night. :) I put him to bed last night and he stayed there until 7:30 this morning. He woke a few times crying but we let him cry it out which is actually more difficult then I expected. We're taking this next week to break a bad habit and I know we'll be thankful for this when he is two and sleeping through the night.  I don't mind the occasional times a child wakes in the middle of the night but for 8 months I have never slept through the night and it is not good for our little family.  
Although I woke every time he did I didn't leave my bed and when I got up this morning it was incredibly refreshing! 
And if you can believe it he was even more happy when we got up early to eat and play.  
I'm making mistakes daily, i'm sure of it but i'm thankful for the people who come alongside of me and gently correct me or show me a better way. 

I love getting letters in the mail.  They're something to hold onto and it's the thought someone put into sending me their words that I love.  I've received a few letters from a distant relative named charles who is one of the sweetest old men I've had the pleasure of talking with.  He has mentioned my great-grandma meske quite a bit and how much she loved me. I remember her very well and miss her so much.  In his latest letter he talked in detail about our family history and it was so neat to learn those things.  Charles was married for 64 years but this last year his wife passed away and he said that things don't work the same without her around.  I hope Darren will think the same when I'm gone. Anyways all that to say it has been a blessing to write and receive these letters.

Well I should get going, hope you have a wonderful day! 

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I'm sure you miss sleeping all night, but it's TOTALLY NORMAL for babies to wake up at night. It's not at all a bad habit or anything that you are causing or doing wrong if your baby isn't sleeping through the night by _ months, or whatever anybody has told you. If it feels wrong to leave your baby to cry it out, then you should listen to your instincts and go get your baby. He won't be waking up at night forever! And this short time where he does wake up at night will seem like barely a blip on the radar when he is older. My advice: enjoy him being a baby and snuggle and nurse him all he wants, because it will be over before you know it and you will miss it. If he wakes up quite a bit and you REALLY need to sleep, then co-sleep with him and you'll both get plenty of rest.