Hey!
I finally have a good solid amount of time to upload pictures and write. I really hope you've been having a great weekend. :)
Today i went 'treasure hunting'. I found some great things, and this very moment my creative juices are flowing and i can't wait to get started on projects around the house. I know that we may be moving in a month but as my mom said, you can take things with you!
I will tell the story through pictures, it's more fun to read that way!


This is my sweet man who did NOT feel like treasure hunting today. :)




STARBUCKS happy hour is the best.<3


Ikea...what an incredible store. My first experience was wonderful and overwhelming all at the same time. I was stoked to be going here today and found a few great buys which were not expensive at all. I made a mental wish list for the future already.

We bought this little table. I'm going to paint it and put a little lighthouse lamp on it i believe. I'm trying to do our second bathroom in a beach theme. Any ideas for what color i should paint this table? I was excited that it was only 5 dollars!

Then i found an apple cutter that I've been meaning to buy for a long time. Also a couple little jars for scrapbooking accessories. I think i did pretty good with not buying too much in a store that amazing!
We also went to a thrift store and although we didn't find anything it was still fun to look around.


Now dear friends...on to the most exciting part of this day for me! With my target gift card i bought a sewing machine! It was such a steal. I had looked up the one i wanted online and when i went into the store i saw a tag that said there was a special promotion. It was on sale along with a free carrying case. I saw the date for the sale ended on the eighth so i found an employee to ask about it. He actually was really nice and gave me the deal! (even though i'm pretty sure it was over with and they forgot to pull the sign off). Anyways it was really exciting, and after that i went to Joann fabrics to pick out a pattern for a pillow. As i was looking through patterns i realized i'm going to need to get a beginners book on how to sew because i'm lost! Still, this new hobby will be a lot of fun and i can't wait to get started. There's so many cute projects you can sew and i'll make sure to post pictures as i begin this new journey.





There you have it! My brand new sewing machine.

<3

I'm going to write a little more about what i've been dealing with this past week.
Last night i stayed up pretty late looking at online sites like country home and country living. In my mind i'm dreaming up a beautiful home that's so comfortable and cozy. I'd love to have a cottage style home. I know that since my husband is in the navy this might not be a reality for us but isn't it fun to imagine? There will be a lot of chances for us to decorate new homes along the way and i'll find joy in that!
Today as we were driving back from ikea the route back was gorgeous! I'm not kidding i was practically jumping for joy because we were driving through the country side and there were farms and for miles and miles i didn't see anything but green rolling hills. It was beautiful and inside my soul leaped for joy. I trust in those moments that God is loving me through something so simple and boring to some, but to me it is beyond words beautiful. I couldn't stop smiling and then i wanted to cry because i longed for a place called home in the middle of nowhere. Don't get me wrong, i love people but i also love the comfort in a home in the country with crickets playing a symphony. The smell of fresh cut grass, and the moments of silence. I told Darren that i longed for a home in the country, away from all the busyness and fast paced lifestyle. The idea of watching the sun rise and set, on a front porch swing is bliss! Yet i have to trust that God's plans are far greater than mine.

I wanted to share an exert from my journal entry two days ago.
"I have only been at true peace when I have surrendered to God every part of me. A blessing to have experienced rest for my soul, but a burden for the days I am not up to obedience. It's a struggle and I realize what hinders me from joy some days, simply my own stubbornness. How God deals with me is beyond me, but I am thankful for each minute he spends next to me. I love him with every inch of me, I really do. I could never forget him or the closeness between us.
Today God allowed something beautiful to happen. I was given the most quiet of days. Nothing to think deeply about, no feelings of inadequacy, no anxiousness because the quiet was way to sweet and something i needed so badly..."

This week was full of struggles left to right. There are moments it seems being a christian would actually make life easier as well as perfect but honestly it's not like that. Making the mistake to believe a Christian's life is picture perfect can be tragic in the end! We stumble and fall every day and sometimes sin trips us up very badly. Wherever our fall takes us, God's grace begins. Choosing obedience is not my first reaction i'm sorry to say. However it is a learned skill that i'm working on daily. I still stomp my feet and complain when things don't turn out exactly how i believe they should. (not literally but you get the point :))
The other day felt like a time out straight from God. Bitterness crept into my heart and i didn't deal with it, Instead I let it fester into something not so pretty! I needed a day full of quietness. Throughout the day i was able to be still before Christ and He was able to work out the ugly in my heart. That evening i wrote about it and realized it was exactly what i needed, a time out. Even grown ups need those from time to time.
Don't be too hard on yourself and don't take life so seriously. It's important to let loose and enjoy the simple things! I want to encourage you to do this because it's a huge struggle i deal with constantly. I am very quick to think everything through and often i miss out on a handful of moments that could have brought happiness my way.

This week i stumbled onto one of my favorite musician's blog. Her name is JJ Heller and she sings songs that are classified as indie/folk. Reading through her blog brought so much warmth! I walked away with a tender heart, a big thank you to her! She shared pictures of her family, home, vacations, ect. It was a picture of a woman who loves God and genuinely enjoys life! This woman has an understanding of balance in a way that i envy. She has a beautiful little girl that is so tiny and adorable, and you can just tell how sweet their lives are since she came into this world. Their marriage seems like a blast! Have you ever met a couple that you just thought, man i wish i could have what they have! Well that's this couple, i'd love to spend an evening with them, it would be full of laughter and good conversation.
Over the past few days and especially since reading this blog i've been encouraged to do a few things.

~Enjoy life! SMILE.
~Pick up a few hobbies. It's fun and good for the soul :)
~Stay healthy and fit.
~Try new recipes and don't be so critical with the finished results.
~Don't be afraid to try new things. Like writing music, singing, learning the guitar or piano (they've been collecting dust!)
~You have one life, and it's your choice how to spend each day...don't spend it laying in bed until 11! ;)
I'm learning a lot and being encouraged to grow. Life can be beautiful, it's all in how you view it and that takes the right attitude.

Have a wonderful night!

~laura

A Picture Post<3
Hello Everyone! Hope you had a great weekend.
Darren and I had a great weekend away with each other. Although it didn't go according to my plans it ended up being really nice. Friday night we headed into Philadelphia and as we were driving to the hotel all i could think was, 'is it too late to find another place?'. I think my husband was trying to be macho man because he told me it was fine and not to worry! It seemed a little sketchy to me though. When we came in they were just getting our room cleaned, but the people were nice. It was one of those hotels where the door opens to the outside. This means one thing....BUGS. After killing a few we settled in and turned the t.v. on and snuggled. We had a nice conversation on the two hour trip and it was so nice to relax! THEN.....i looked out of the corner of my eye and saw something crawling on the bed by my feet. I flew out of the bed and yelped. There was a big spider ON the bed. Darren killed in and took care of it very quickly. However i stood with my hands over my face for awhile refusing to get back into the bed. It was a romance killer let me tell you, but Darren was so great. He made a lot of jokes about it. (I love that about him) We laughed about it for the rest of the night and i eventually climbed back into the bed. Then Saturday we headed out to the braves v. Phillie's game and the braves won! We had Philly cheese steaks and saw the liberty bell. Also picked up a parking ticket. All in all it was a nice weekend away with Darren and I'm glad we were able to see a new city and make a few more memories.

Sunday i spent a lot of time cleaning up the house and doing laundry. I stayed up late planning meals for the next two weeks. I'm really excited for all the cooking and baking ahead of me. Tonight i worked out with Denise and then went to the commissary. It feels nice eating right and working out! After dinner Darren and I took a walk which turned into a run...a very fast run. We were sprinting together and i felt 6 years old! We were racing, then we ended up jogging the rest of the way. We had a great night together. He even helped me fold some of the laundry after i begged him for ten minutes. As my friend Denise told me, it's how you ask. Sometimes you have to be specific in your requests.
I went over to Denise's tonight to bring some food over and sat with Isaiah for a little while. He's almost four months and has stolen my heart! Seriously, that little guy is the sweetest. He cries like all babies but he's a lot of fun. Tomorrow morning i'm going to babysit for a little while and i'm looking forward to it. I look forward to motherhood more and more these days. I recognize the responsibility that goes along with being parents but there is a lot of joy as well.

I posted a couple pictures from our trip, The military spouse appreciation luncheon, and a little look into 'Laura's Kitchen'. I wanted to share kitchen pictures because i spend a lot of time in there and it's a happy place for me! Hope you enjoy looking through them.


Denise and I :)



Julie, Denise, a new friend, and I

Yummy lasagna! For the first time, it turned out nice.

My fridge is where i post my encouraging notes, mostly from my grandma. And some verses to live by.

My favorite candle! This one makes the whole house smell great. I love the smell of a Carmel, vanilla, sugary candle. It's heart warming i think. Something about lighting a candle always puts me in a good mood. Today i lit this candle and played Jim Brickman...made for a very relaxing afternoon!

My williams Sonoma soup/lotion! My sister in law has the same set and i'm in love with it, so when we went shopping i picked the same scent. It's great soap. I feel very cute when i use it because it smells amazing.

My cookbook stand is a huge help. I recommend to all you ladies to invest in one. There are a lot of cute ones out there. I bought mine at books a million in the cookbook section.

I made these tags and wrapped the ribbon around these jars from target. I love the 'country' touch is has. I'm still looking for a country style store around here but haven't had much luck. In Indiana there were a couple great places to find things that would fit well into that style but we didn't have the money to buy a lot then. I guess it's okay that i'm not finding a store, it will save us money. :)

This was our yummy dinner! I think it's important to sit at the dinner table or together and have a nice dinner together. I always feel bad when families never eat together, because growing up it was were the best conversations took place. I love sitting down thanking God for the meal, indulging in delicious food (most of the time!), and then talking with Darren.

Me! In my new apron that has an 'L' printed on the front. I love it! Making lasagna for the first time. It didn't turn out like my mamma's but i think she'd be proud still.

This was sunday's dinner. We had breakfast for dinner and it turned our really good. I love being able to stay at home as a wife. I'm finding more energy now to put together better meals and not be lazy and always go out to eat.

This is Saturday at the ballgame. It was very windy in philly! I almost lost Darren's hat a couple times :p. I am falling in love with baseball more and more, i never thought i'd enjoy it as much as i am. It's fun to have a team you like and know the players.

THIS is the place..the hotel we stayed in with the spider. ;) The great thing was the next morning when i walked out and we saw a beautiful view of a lake.

SEE! It's not sooo bad. I stood out here for a little bit and enjoyed the view. It made me forget about the creepy bugs and sketchy area.e

Hope you enjoyed the pictures! It didn't take so long to upload them thankfully.

Last night I spent a little time in the book of Daniel. Whenever i open that book something special happens. I don't feel lost or the need to understand exactly how or why this particular book i'm reading came to be. I understand the truth in each word. There was a certain measure of protection as the bible was passed down and put together that brings great comfort. I read it, and am aware of the words penetrating through my heart like no other book does. God speaks loudly through those words. You can't deny the way these books and chapters intertwine with each other. They each fit together perfectly and as i read more and make connection i feel like i'm solving a puzzle. There are very exciting moments when i'm reading, because it's coming alive to me.

Today as i was doing laundry i realized how much i love the quietness. Peace is needed in our crazy world! I'm encouraged to take time away and sit back to breathe...we're too fast paced and forget to enjoy life. There are opportunities missed when we're too busy. I don't have a full plate right now and would like to add a couple more things in the coming months. I want to be able to serve people more with my time. Not go crazy with a full schedule but at least a few times a week be involved with helping someone or maybe be involved in a church. Which brings me into a guilty confession...

Darren and I haven't been going to church since we moved to Maryland. There is no excuse. At first our schedules were a little crazy and then when life settled down Sunday became a time we slept in. I listen to sermons online all the time and spend a lot of time in the word and speak with God quite often. I know this has been a conviction i've been ignoring. I kept saying well the next place we're at i'll make sure we find somewhere to go. I don't like 'church shopping', as you can see i completely avoided it all together. It's not okay though. We need to be in a church, learning about God, having fellowship with other believers, giving, and being involved. I'm completely guilty of being lazy...and i'm sorry! I know as a christian this isn't an example of Christ. This Sunday Darren and I are going to a church. Although we may only be around for a month more we realize it's important to go. This final push came from my beloved mother. I call her on mothers day and get scolded! Such a mother thing...;) I love her though, and know i needed to hear what she said! It's not easy to be corrected, but listen to the corrections because most likely it's from God.

Alright i'm going to head to bed! Have another fun filled day tomorrow and need to get to bed a little earlier. Talk to you again soon!

~Laura

Happy Friday! And a HUGE thank you to all of the military spouses around the world. Reagen made sure there was a day that recognized us and i'm really thankful for that! (good man!) Between deployments, dirty diapers, keeping the house clean, juggling activities, missing your husband, and keeping everything together you are strong women!

Today i went to a luncheon that was really nice! They really did pamper us girls and i needed it! The speaker talked about always feeling lost when people asked what she did. That question always haunts me! I related with her because i always feel a little lost when someone asks me that question. As though what i'm doing isn't good enough. As a military spouse you go into it knowing you're going to have to make sacrifices. But no one can fully prepare you for what that actually means. I realize now that for me it means i will have to take school at a slower pace and because of the moves it will require a few different schools along the way. I will have to make do when he needs to be there for his job and not be mopey! When the time comes that we start having kids i will have to make even more sacrifices. Darren will not always be there to help me out and i may have to raise our children without him being present as times. I DO HAVE GOOD NEWS! God doesn't let you stand all alone. He PROVIDES! Through family and friends that he's placed in my life i've seen how true he is to taking care of me.

It's hard to be married to the military. I'm only just entering this new chapter in our lives and i have moments i am very scared. But before i have time to think about it along comes a friend! God surely will provide for our needs. So a big thank you to all the military spouses!

This past week my husband and I went to the braves game. It was a blast! After feeling a bit distant from him lately it was very rejuvenating to have a night out doing something we both love! A baseball game! We talked a lot and laughed the entire night! The braves even pulled through for us and won. There was a lot of little things in our marriage that weren't huge issues but were becoming more noticeable and we were able to communicate with each other in a healthy way. I am even more in love with him because of moments like that! It's amazing to watch your husband grow and to be able to say he is a man after God's heart makes me smile so much! I need his leadership and faith in God like i need oxygen. The relationship he has with God shapes him into an incredible man and the husband i need! Also, it helps me as a wife to thrive and meet his needs on a whole new level. We are two imperfect people but we're crazy about each other. I know as Christ makes his way to the center of our hearts and as we walk in obedience with Him, our marriage becomes exactly the thing that glorifies him. God wants to see marriages work and he will answer prayers that a miracle would happen to save this marriage. I stand first hand telling you to HOLD ON if your feeling lonely, out in the dark, not important, etc. God has a plan and purpose for your life. At times i am far to concerned with what Darren is not doing that i neglect to see my own sin. Let God be God, and you be that cute wife that pours love out to your husband. Again...don't trash talk ladies! It's not going to fix your marriage. If you need to talk to someone, first pray and then find a good family member, or close friend that will listen but give you encouraging advice. I praise God that my husband has not ever bad mouthed me to family and friends. People don't need to see all of our dirty laundry. I think of the woman in proverbs 31 who praised her husband! Please go back and read that passage, it's something we woman need to see. Not to perfect her but see her as a model of how we should be as woman.

Well I am itching to get out of here for our weekend getaway! It's going to be so nice to spend more time together and the two of us are in a great place in our marriage to celebrate and enjoy each other! God has blessed us richly, and i'm very thankful for that. I will post pictures when we get back.

Okay to end on a happy note, It's time for a fun story. This morning i woke up at four to take darren to work and a huge moth flew and other huge yucky bug flew in. As we were walking out i realized...'Wait i'm going to have to go back in there and find them when i come back..ughhh' I'm just not awake that early enough to hunt bugs. Well i hardly had time to hunt because as i walked in and ran to the kitchen to get the fly swatter (i thought i had time thinking they'd be in the stairway) the moth attacked me! :o it was in the kitchen flying very fast! So there i am around four in the morning screaming and doing my 'i've got the Ibbie jeebies' dance! It was probably quite funny to watch but i was freaking out and running into the living room, then running back into the kitchen swinging the fly swatter around like a mad woman! I missed every time of course. Then it flew into the stairway. Yes friends, i stood downstairs for a lonnnnggg time to afraid to run upstairs. The moth landed pretty high up in the staircase and the other nasty bug was around there too. I quickly schemed to get squishy baseballs to throw at them. Of course i missed and then realized i was acting crazy and was needing to go back to bed! Well they both disappeared and now i'm jumping for joy that i'm leaving and don't have to deal with them! But you better believe i've been looking everywhere for them. It's the little things in life like this that crack me up! I am seriously considering hiring someone to come live with me to help fight the creepy crawlers. ;)

To my future babies, i am sorry ahead of time! You're mommy is the biggest wimp when it comes to killing bugs, but i'll always give you a good laugh.

Enjoy your weekend everyone!

~laura

Good evening!

I've been sitting on my computer for a little while and decided i should really write something! Writing is always something that blesses me more than i can explain. It formulates clear sentences and ideas from all the jumbled mess that goes on inside my head! The verses referring to being still before God are always the hardest for me! The thoughts roll in one by one and then the depths of those thoughts have levels you couldn't believe. We'll call me a 'deep thinker' and leave it at that! Sometimes it does drive me crazy because i have a lot of random thoughts about things i read and can't come to a conclusion.
For example, this issue about Jennifer Knapp coming out of the closet has my mind in tangles. There is a lot of really sad thoughts with this issue forcing to push me down and it's a battle. Jennifer Knapp was one of my favorite musicians and throughout high school I clung to the lyrics she wrote for life support at times. Her song 'refine me', and 'hold me now' were my two favorite. They were songs filled with such raw emotion and yet uplifting. She left the music scene in 2003 and disappeared for awhile. I always wondered where she went but didn't think too much on the matter. Then last week while reading an entry from Addison road's blog it mentioned Jennifer Knapp being a homosexual. The Bible refers to homosexuality as a sin. We may not agree but from reading the bible it is pretty clear God is not okay with it. I do not put this particular sin above others though, sin is sin. I am upset about the fact that Jennifer Knapp is justifying her sin. She has been gone for 7 years, traveling and five of those years with her partner in Australia. Now she is coming back to play music again, and although there are mixed reviews from many fans I'm still shaking my head. As i read through interviews there is an underlying discomfort for her. I'm thankful for that! To come back into the spotlight and claim God is okay with sin and then write what i call 'angry music' aimed towards the church, well i'm just wondering why? This story angers me and i'm left trying to pick up the pieces of a young girl that adored this artist only to find out her music was probably written at a time she was trying to figure out her struggle. (It's disturbing)
Sin is messy. I don't not like Jennifer Knapp but i can't listen to her music anymore. It's not because she's a homosexual. It's because she is making statements that God is okay with her sin. Aren't we always trying to justify sin? We are too afraid to call sin what it is. I'm a sinner and there are certain times i try to justify why i sinned. I could write a book on this very topic. Our world and the blame game! We all have been at fault for this at one time in our life. It's not natural to fight sin, but the way God rewards you for struggling through to victory is incredible. I don't know what jennifer knapp is going through, i don't have her thoughts and battles but the worst thing for me to do is bad mouth her. Her lifestyle is a sin and there are at least three places in the Bible that make reference to that. However, it's not my place to point any fingers because if i remember correctly pride is mentioned WAY more in the bible then homosexuality. Right now i'm working on praying for her and committing all my thoughts on this to God.

Moving along! Currently i am drugged up on suddefed pe. The way it knocks me out is wonderful but when i come back to the sickness is still there! Bummer. I've been sick since Tuesday with sinus junk. It's now almost Monday and i'm still sneezing, coughing, and stuffy nosed. I am at the stage where the Kleenex is piling up on my nightstand and i'm wondering why i dont bring a trash can next to the bed. I tried to run friday and that was a huge mistake! I started running and hardly made a dent into my two miles because i was sneezing and wheezing. I walked the rest of the way completely miserable! I tried to soak up the beauty of the sun and some quiet time with God but i admitted to him i couldn't wait to be inside! I love being outside but i'm thinking this is allergies. I read tonight that the pollen around here is very high. I didn't know i had allergies but this can't be a cold. It's lasting way too long! Now comes the not so fun part. I know this isn't getting better and my friends told me to go to the doctor but i just hate the doctors! I hate going alone, having someone inspect me, not having any idea whats going on, and waiting around for what seems to be forever. Am i alone on this? But...tomorrow i'm going to call and make an app. because i need medicine! Funny, i'm wrapping this paragraph up and i sneezed! It's official i need to go see a doctor. :)

Part of growing as a christian is going through the fire to be refined. It's not an easy or fun process obviously but i know whenever it happens it's for a good reason. During these times i learn hard lessons, or realize God is bringing sin to my attention. The purpose of this is for His glory, so that i may become more like Christ. That knowledge alone brings a huge amount of peace to my heart. This past week i've been feeling a lot and missing my husband like crazy. I am so hard on myself when it comes to walking with God. I wanted to share a very personal experience in hopes that it may encourage you!
Thursday i was talking to the lord and praising him for bringing me some really great friends into my life that are very fun! Also the fact that I know He is working in their lives and i have the chance to see that is incredible. I was looking forward to getting our toes done and having dinner saturday night. (it turned out to be a lot of fun, and we have cute toes now!) Anyways before my class i had some time so i was listening to music on my phone (Pandora radio), when a great song came on! Addison Road's, "What do i know of holy". I was sitting on the side of my bed praising God and singing this song to him. The place i sang from was not on my bed but from a place in my heart that used to be an empty corner filled with sin, that He had over time filled with Himself. An overwhelming sense of awe spilled over through song. I don't have God figured out, and it's not easy to walk this road. Some days it's scary because it can be lonely if you don't force yourself into His presence. This experience of joy came from a long journey of surrendering a place in my heart i hadn't given to him. I want to encourage you to surrender all of your life to God. He loves you, and that's why he sent Jesus. So that you could have a more abundant life. Honestly, you were made for him and if you still have the emptiness inside, please sit back and think about making a decision to let God into your heart.

In the next few weeks Darren and I will find out where we'll be going next in June. I am excited to know but strangely i can't see myself moving to another state next month. Seems like we settled into our home yesterday! These are the times i'm reminded i'm married to a Sailor. :) Please pray for us as we find out where we're going next. Mainly for a peaceful transition, these moves can be hectic! Thanks so much!
Alright well i'm going to watch some more i love lucy and take more medicine so that i can fall asleep! I slept from 6-9 tonight...did i mention my sleep schedule is all sorts of messed up!

Goodnight<3

laura

To start i'd like to say THANK YOU to those that read this! The comments on this page are open to anyone to drop a message. I love hearing back from you, it encourages me to keep writing!

Frankly, i am not a morning person. I will be a sweet woman and i wouldn't dare be rude with you but i am a mess in the morning! In my head i'm still scheming ways to manage five more minutes of sleep! This morning i happen to be waking up at 4 to drop Darren off, i had enough energy to make hot pockets though! (when food is involved that's a whole new story haha) I went back to sleep and dragged myself out of bed at 9:30 which is nothing compared to most of you but i happen to be a night owl and stay up way too late! My two friends Denise and Julie and i were going to workout again this morning. I had a ton of energy for some reason! I was on the treadmill feeling like i could run for miles and miles. Us girls had a great time and for the first time in my life i can honestly say i look forward to working out! I don't mind it, but there is something special about having two friends go with you, have conversation, laugh about goofy things, and the friendly company. What's not to love about working out!! I am thanking God for all the energy and i blame my two wonderful friends who let me be my goofy self.

Our next activity was to Bob Evans to cancel out our morning workout but fill our starving bellies! We justified it in at least three ways! haha i had a delicious turkey wrap with french fries. We enjoyed more conversation and i have to say i am loving Denise's son. (He is adorable) After lunch we headed to Target/Starbucks. We walked around for awhile in our favorite store! I knew they were good friends when they accepted me only because my love for target/Starbucks. :P I bought a couple very cute shirts and a pair of new adorable SHOES! I am not a shoe lover, i absolutely love having bare feet. (a true country girl)

I had a great time with my friends and am treasuring all the time we'll be able to spend together before the military moves us away!

Right now it is pretty late and my husband has been asleep since he came home! I have enjoyed being in his company tonight and glancing over at him occasionally. He is way too handsome! I was thinking about when i first met him and he played baseball at bethel. If he could do anything in the world it would be a professional baseball player. As for now, he lives out the dream by managing a billion fantasy baseball teams. :)

:)

I was able to talk to my sister on the phone today and she was telling me about how my two nieces and two nephews received their letters from me and were so excited. I miss them all so much, and can't wait to be able to plan a trip to see everyone. I loved writing those letters and am anxious to hear back from them! She said they're almost done writing back. I love seeing them grow over the years but want to be closer! I think it's important to make the most out of your situation and right now i'm far away but that doesn't mean i can't be a part of their lives.

I am happy. I've been smiling a lot and feeling light on my feet. I feel like Laura :) That is a refreshing statement! Lately God and I are having serious 'attitude' talks in the beginning of the day. I can't control the circumstances but i can choose how to respond. No matter what is going on or the people around are acting, it's important to be obedient to God. I've learned that obedience yields joy! I started reading Daniel and last night i finally inched into chapter one. It takes a little bit of studying before you even open the book to get a good picture of what's going on, why this book is important, basically i want to know as much of the history as possible. (I love Studying the Bible.) Anyways, Daniel and his three friends entered the scene and after being taken away from their homeland through capture by king Nebuchadnezzar they are facing tough choices. They have moved into a culture that does not honor God. There are a few choices that they need to make as Christians that set them apart. I love how Daniel and the other three are holding onto their faith in Christ and in return God is walking with them and blessing them. He's not removing them from the circumstances, but these men are living out their faith in front of a culture that believes their foolish. I am encouraged by this chapter and i still have many more to go!

Onto other news....Darren and I have been talking about adding a new addition to our little family. That addition being a little furry friend! We are thinking a little kitten. I looked at a dozen baby kittens and wrote a few emails requesting information. Tonight i was answered and they are VERY hesitant in letting military families adopt their animals. They said because of the frequent moves and the chance an animal could not go with. I'm sad about this but am going to be understanding! People in the military have animals all the time so there must be a way around this. I'd just adore a kitten/cat and take the best care of it. I'm praying that there's a way to be able to have one!

I love Maryland, and all of the sunshine! This picture was taken a month ago at fort mchenry where the national anthem was written. Spring has been beautiful here and I've tried hard to enjoy every week of it!

Well i need to get to bed. I have a cough/sore throat/on and off fever since last night and i'm praying it clears up for this weekend because i'm having a ladies weekend! Saturday we're pampering ourselves by getting a pedicure, cooking dinner, and playing games. Then we're going to the christian bookstore to find a bible study to start weekly. I Can't wait!

-laura

A rainy monday

Good evening! it's almost Tuesday but i'm finding myself with time to write and a full heart ready to spill over.

Darren works across the base and it's too far to walk/ride a bike so we decided with our one car I'd drop him off. Three mornings of the week we wake up at 4:00 to drop him off for p.t. Thankfully i can go back to sleep ;) Well this morning i was driving back to the house (half asleep) when a radio broadcast about one of my favorite music groups, Selah came on. Todd smith and his wife Angie went through their story of their fourth little girl dying a few hours after she was born. They were told ahead of time of the complications but didn't believe in terminating their daughter. As they told their story and the couple hours their family had to spend with their little girl i started shaking my head because i knew the tears were on the way and i just didn't want to hear another one of these devastating stories that break my heart. I was about to turn the station but then the mother said something incredible. She had explained that when she found out she forced herself to say over and over that God is still the same as he was that morning. I soaked up every word of that truth! He is the same God no matter what conditions we go through in life.

Then i spent some time with a couple really great girls working out at the gym! I ran and did some strength training. I'm Looking forward to going to the gym tomorrow as well. My weight has been fluctuating since i've been married and it's driving me crazy. I love food so much and i'm not picky which is part of the problem! I was at a good weight two months ago and now i've gained some weight back and here i go again with the mindset to lose 10 pounds! :) it can be frustrating but i have to remember that although it's good to be healthy, i can't believe that if i'm a perfect weight then i'm acceptable. I'm happy to work out though, i don't mind it. It's the part where i have to watch how much i'm eating that i'm not fond with! I envy the twigs out there that can eat as much as they'd like and not gain any weight. Please have a pile of french fries for me as i cut back :)

I listened to a sermon from the church i attended throughout my high school years. The sermon was in reference to not being unequally yoked. I LOVED the way pastor A. explained the true meaning of this passage. It's talking about being yoked to God, not this world. That does not mean you shun the people in this world but that you are available and there for the friends and people God puts in your life. I've always heard those verses talking about marriage and not marrying a non-believer which makes sense, but it was good to see this passage in a new light. I was encouraged by the fact that it's to God i need to be yoked with. He's going to walk with me and remain my source of strength and joy when i choose to invite him into my heart.
I'm a sinner that's not something new, but there are certain sins that i've dealt with that as of recently i really see God pulling out of me bit by bit. Old familiar lies i believed about myself he is forcing me to hand over and allow the junk in my mind/heart to be removed. It's a painful yet cleansing process. I know this process is for His glory and that is the truth that makes it a little easier.

I sometimes wonder what my marriage will look like in ten years from now. Will I be a little more mature? Will the little things still bug me? Will i still have my days i am too hard on Darren? Since i first met Darren it has been interesting to say the least. My husband is the most interesting guy i know. He has me on my toes constantly. Right when i start thinking i've figured him out he throws me a curve ball! This past month i'd say we were going through a bit of a drought. You're going to have this when you take God out of the picture. I was so excited about the things going on and darren was not as enthusiastic about the changes as i was. I must have tried three separate conversations and all i received was a simple nod and 'uh huh'. I went to a good friend and complained and whined thinking it would make me feel better and after several conversations with her i realized, 'wow laura you are gossiping about your husband and badmouthing him over and over because he's not reacting in a way you think he should.' I believe God brought this to my attention through the words of my mother. She would always tell me to not talk bad about darren. I felt really ashamed of myself because gossiping about darren isn't going to fix the insecurities I am having.
The marriage God intended for me was built upon Himself. When i am faithfully seeking and being obedient to God my marriage is blissful and there is a true joy found between darren and I. Inside of darren are gifts that are smothered when i am trying to make him into an image of the perfect guy. This is satan's work i'm carrying out when i smother him with put downs or 'you' statements. Thankfully i have a husband who is as patient as they come. I had to apologize to him and admit i was wrong for being so hard on him. I am going to have 'top of the mountain' experiences with God and he'll listen and be excited but he may not tell me how he feels about that for three more days! This is okay :) God is teaching me all of this and more. I don't want to change my man. I see God working in his heart and he occasionally tells me very profound statements that blow me away. He loves God and i am crazy about him because of that. But i love how he loves me. Darren has given a lot for me that i forgot about. He truly does take care of me for better or worse. Trust me when i tell you he has seen the worst of me and still chose to stay. I have been praying lately that i'd be refreshing to him. A safe haven from the daily grind. If it was up to me we'd engage in soul to soul conversations all the time, but since it's not up to me...i'm learning that in reality you need time for quietness, for laughter, for small chatter, light hearted conversations, back massages, playing games side by side, being apart, and more. Marriage is complex and this relationship with Darren is a work in progress but i want you to know i am falling more in love with my husband. I am not perfect and have sinned against him but i can honestly tell you he is my best friend, the one my heart leaps for joy over. I want to run away from him sometimes because the worst thing is when he sees me fail. This is the fuel that motivates me to become a wife after God's heart so that i can love Darren the way God intended me to.
I have fallen many times into the beliefs of this world that it's all about me, and listened/believed all my statements about putting my husband down for this or that. I encourage you now, do not start bad mouthing your husband/wife because that is exactly where satan wants you to go. You take your eyes off Christ and start focusing on yourself and you will quickly find yourself in a pit. There is nothing freeing about gossiping about your marriage. It is important to pray pray pray because God knows your heart, and maybe the problem is not your husband but you. I have found this true for me. I was being selfish and expecting unfair things from him. I was wanting him to make me happy all the time by doing exactly what i wanted him to do. I think you get the point. When there's a time of frustration in your marriage it's time to go to God humbly in prayer and confess all the feelings and thoughts you are having. We need to ask God to search our hearts. It's not easy, and i will be the first to admit that but work through conflict the right way.

Darren admires me at times and shares a compliment with me when i least expect it. It happens to be perfect how that works out. He can be very unpredictable, but i love the familiar little things he does. I can't tell you how devastated i will be when he goes away for long periods of time. I am not the type of girl that sucks it up and pretends life is okay. However, I will be real and say it hurts, that i miss him. There is nothing normal about your husband leaving for six months. It's going to be okay to have days i dont want to get out of bed because i miss him that much! I married a handsome, funny, good man and every inch of me want to see him every day. I will trust in God that he'll use time of separation to build each of us up and strengthen our marriage. I will pray for strength to be a light for Christ and be there for others as a good friend. Life as a navy wife is full of unpredictable events and without God's steady hand in my life i'd be completely lost.
Goodnight<3
-laura
1 John 3
1How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!

Hey! I hope you had a great weekend!

I had a hard week as a navy wife. After months and months of suppressing my sadness for missing family, friends, church, Indiana, etc well this happen to be the week that i couldn't hold it in anymore. I think my husband is wonderful for listening to me vent about missing everything. I'm very homesick and feel like i've been on a vacation and need to go home now! :) It doesn't work this way! I'm very thankful for having people and places to miss though. Mostly i miss my mother though. She is the best because she tells me how it is but she always knows when i need to just be hugged so i can cry like a little girl! My mother is wonderful and i have to say i HATE phone calls with her because it makes it hurt even more. I told a friend that i've been avoiding calling my mom lately because i know i'll start to cry. My mom knows me the good and bad, and yet accepts me. I'm sure i've practically driven her crazy at times but i've never once doubted how much she loves me. I love her, she loves God and is an incredible wife and mother. No she's not perfect and she'll be the first to tell you this, but I love how authentic she is. I've seen Christ in her and he has used her MANY times in my own life. I remember my teen years there was a true struggle between us. I was a stubborn brat at times and very rude. I'm very thankful that she loved me through those years, i was hard to live with. Having a mother like her is a blessing from God. I can't wait to see her again.
My parents are two of my heroes. Their both an example of remembering to lighten up and smile! My Dad is the happiest guy i've ever known, and my mom is all of the above and more! They have a marriage that shows love and respect on both sides. I am thankful that they never walked away when life became hard, they learned each other and chose to love even knowing the other's flaws. My parents are friends! They actually like each other and you can see that.

I wanted to start off by talking about them because they gave me something that happens to be the BEST gift. Introducing me to Jesus as my savior. God chose them to be my parents and they were obedient to him. All because their parents were the same way. I have a deep adoration for my parents and grandparents. Since i was born i've been surrounded with people that are serious about God. I was given the opportunity to see Christ in people from a young age. This is a blessing if i've ever known one!
I love studying my bible and if it was up to me, i'd start bible college asap! I've been looking into liberty college for a religion degree. Oh i can't even explain how excited i was when i looked into the types of classes i'd be taking. It was like Christmas morning! The more Darren and i talk about this university we realize it may not be in our budget yet. Bummer! I am the sort of girl that listens to sermons for fun, and Sunday mornings when the message is over i am disappointed. I could listen to a good message for hours and hours and not be bored. My struggle right now is having a hunger to study the Bible but feeling as though i dont have all the tools!
Okay i will have to wrap this up seeing that it's late! How'd that happen? I'll write in the next few days because there is still so much i'd love to be able to share! Thanks for reading and spending your time catching up with my life!
love,
laura

P.S. I LOVE spell checker!